Welcome

Welcome to my blog! I am so excited to share my creation and inner processing with you ❤ Where to start? Firstly, I love to blog 🙂 Topics include my experiences, processing and evolving thoughts on... my miscarriage grief and trying to conceivenarcissistic experiences [daughter of narcissist]histories of sexual violence and witnessing domestic violence and … Continue reading Welcome

My perspective of the world via playdough

I don't see god as a wizard type dude that sits on a chair granting and denying wishes or handing out verdicts. No judgement if this is what works for you, great. I know that everyone has their own personal relationship with the divine, and that billions of people find meaning in the term and depiction … Continue reading My perspective of the world via playdough

Unpacking ancestral dichotomies.

I have been looking into the stories and magic of my ancestors. Unfortunately I have found that ancestral reverence comes hand in hand with a lot of visceral trauma. No matter who we are, where we are from and how we interact with life, life is inescapably painful. [Note: this is *before* the structures and … Continue reading Unpacking ancestral dichotomies.

Addiction and love.

Dear my dear, An Addict, I see you.I see the pain you are in.  I see the heartbreaking and soul crushing things that have happened in your life, happened to you.  I see the unimaginable pain and loss you have gone through. Things the human heart can barely hold. I see how and why and … Continue reading Addiction and love.

Past friendships. Present dreams.

There was this girl. We'll call her Friend. Friend and I went to daycare together, when we were about 3 or something. We went to primary school together. And we went to high school together. We should have been closer. Maybe? If all the fairytales are true. I used to walk from my house, to … Continue reading Past friendships. Present dreams.

Owning my darkness

I have had two of my friends loose babies in the last few weeks, and another grapple with probably not falling pregnant again.  I reached out to them all. I wanted to know that I have seen that darkness, I had been there. In that specific darkness. And I could help hold the light, and … Continue reading Owning my darkness

Psychiatrist appointment.

"the anxiety and depression is a symptom, like a headache, not the cause"... no shit Sherlock. (exasperated sarcasm) ~-~-~ She asked some weird questions. "How did [the abuse] happen? Was she coming home from work tired? Were you a problem child? A difficult child?" What the actual fuck. ~-~-~ She asked me to describe my … Continue reading Psychiatrist appointment.