I have been so lucky to be on a beautiful, wonderful, painful, brutal, gut wrenching, life changing journey over this last month. And I wanted to share some of it. I wanted to explore some yogic teachings - and the meaning I have come to, since pregnancy and miscarriage. There is so much meaning that can … Continue reading Yogic teachings, pregnancy and a miscarriage.
So I fell pregnant. Fell is a pretty good word in that situation. Like, you can totally pretend that you have control, but you don't. You are at the mercy of forces greater than yourself. And it is so scary, and quick. Or not quick. But there is totally a tipping point. So I fell pregnant. … Continue reading Why falling pregnant was amazing for my yoga. And the now.
So after the most life-sustaining, loving, and nourishing morning [cue previous post], I had a horrific experience. Cue this post. Okay, wait. Before I start... no-one really knows 'for certain' if I have or haven't lost a baby. The doctors have run tests. Medical professionals will be able to give me some idea of what … Continue reading What not to say to someone who has just lost a baby. Or in the process of possibly loosing a baby.
So today has been a big day. A big day from a big week. I found out on Monday that I was carrying my first offspring. This morning I found blood. I freaked out. I called my husband, who said he'd only stay at work an hour longer and come home (but ended up coming … Continue reading The compassion I really needed today.
Warning. The following discusses sexual assault, and may trigger or otherwise be uncomfortable for some readers
So I have just spent the last 30 minutes instagram-ing someone I went to high school with. I'm not even on instagram!! Why do I do this? Why do I compare myself to every. other. person.!! Why do I spend time hating on myself? Why source out things that make me hate myself? But … Continue reading because self destruction is a thing. it happens in small steps.
I used to go on these camps. Camps for disadvantaged and underprivileged youth. They were heaven. Here I was loved, believed, taken an interest in. Here I was invited to do things. Fun things. Child related things. I was asked to contribute to the chores - maybe once a day. Washing or drying dishes. That's … Continue reading That Jumping Group Hug. And holding on for dear life.