It is so confronting on so many levels. I am faced with versions of my perceptions of self. And the stark reality of being different to that perception. Different to this perceived idealised self. I have not read that book (or that one, or that one, or that one). I have not integrated that knowledge … Continue reading Moving house: moving perception of self
So. This makes sense in my head, but I can't help but feel like it is disjointed and fractured. Key Concepts: ~ The universe / god is the ultimate and all things at all times in every way. ~ It is spoken about here as the ocean. With the individual identity / ego being the … Continue reading Trying to iron out my thoughts on life and reality and consciousness
I want to understand the intricacies if the entirety of yoga philosophy, cultural interplays and contemporary understanding and forgotten mysteries before I do a single yoga pose. And apply that to all things. Eating. Sleeping. Parenting. Playing. Painting. Walking. Working. It all.
I was so wound up in the chaos and intensity in my mind, that I couldn't see clearly. I mean that figuratively and to some extent literally. The fog was incredible. I have previously spent so much time and energy exploring the recesses of my mind. I like to think that I am insightful and … Continue reading Asking for help is hard. But it gets better.
I am rebelling against the system. Rebelling against all the voices in my head that have come from countless friends and strangers and good intentions. Voices that tell me my baby should sleep for longer, and more often and most of all alone. Today I tried. Because I wanted to. Because to-do lists are increasing and … Continue reading Precious bubba, precious sleep.
I was leaving a lovely and refreshing catchup with an old colleague. And I cried. I was leaving the child health nurse appointment. And I cried. I was leaving brunch and hangout with my best friend. And I cried. It doesn't matter if I am catching up with my favourites, or admiring others admire my … Continue reading trains and postpartum anxiety/depression
I have spent so much of my time trying to understand and unpack narcissism, and its permutations, patterns and presentations. I have explored its impact and the residual conditioning it has left behind. I have distanced myself from that narcissist, and do everything in my power to disengage from any and all other narcissists. But what … Continue reading what if I am the narcissist?