Please don't get me wrong. I love that you are here. I am excited, and I invite you to witness and engage as you feel so drawn to do. But I am drawing the line at what is my responsibility, and what is yours. My intention This blog is about owning and honouring myself. Deeply and … Continue reading I am under no obligation to make sense to you
My niece (cousin), my gorgeous, innocent, angelic, 9 year old niece, is taking her lastbreaths. And it is that once in a life time thing that you wish you never experience. You hope you never understand this. Because this is paradigm shifting. In what world is it fair, or even just ok for a lively, … Continue reading My baby, and your baby’s funeral.
Keep breathing. That's what I would say. One breath at a time. And then, rather incessantly... It's okay, I'm okay, Baby is okay. It's okay, I'm okay, Baby is okay. It's okay, I'm okay, Baby is okay. I have a baby. I am pregnant. At least according to the non-existent period, and the 6 different pregnancy tests. … Continue reading What would I say to me?
I can't today. And I don't know why. Shall we blame the anxiety, or the overwhelm? Shall we blame the journey, or the dates? Shall we blame perceptions, or the lack of innate knowing? I just think that something to blame would make this a bit easier right now. And I don't know what that … Continue reading the not-so-good day
I really was. I texted my friend - who had just delivered her once-in-a-lifetime-baby. I reached out beyond the 'yay' of announcement. I genuinely reached out. And I meant it. AND it hurt. I know that it is a horrible thing, but I felt like vomiting when I got her announcement text. I changed my … Continue reading I was gracious
I found this in my drafts, and can feel the passion! I am lucky to not feel this intense right now, but I wanted to share because this is something that I have felt consistently! ~-~-~ I need you to stop blaming me for this. Infertility is not a choice. It is not something I … Continue reading Raging about TTC blaming and shaming. Raging about the whole thing.
I just folded Baby's little jumpsuit. And I put the bibs in the draw underneath. I threw out the tissue paper I had wrapped them in, when I gave them to my husband. I kept the gift bag though. I hadn't touched them since I had hidden them away. After probably a month of … Continue reading Making space. Literally.