Present Pregnancy; Past Trauma.

TW: sexual abuse/trauma. Pregnancy is incredibly intense. At the best of times. Even with lots of love and support. Pregnancy can also be incredibly triggering. Here are some ways that I have found this pregnancy to be re-triggering, and some ideas about where to go from here.   The Powerlessness of the Medical Industry The … Continue reading Present Pregnancy; Past Trauma.

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Can you stop chastising my unborn child?!

This blows my mind. I have been very closed with pretty much everything related to my pregnancy; symptoms, experiences, feelings, plans... all of it. And I think it was an un/conscious form of self protection. I didn't need the barrage of competing and contradictory "must-know" tidbits that would "certainly" impede my life or my child's. … Continue reading Can you stop chastising my unborn child?!

No, you are not entitled to my unborn child.

The background to this is so much mush. Part of it is from the latest round of family 'pregnancy reveals' and the subsequent requests/comments/etc. And the other part of it was when I read a forum about women not revealing their pregnancy till late, very late, and not at all - during the internal incubation … Continue reading No, you are not entitled to my unborn child.

Why I needed to both see and not-see that miscarriage on TV.

My husband and I have a regular Netflix and Hang-out date night thing going on. It sounds like the usual Netflix and Chill thing, without the need to be dressed up or groomed in any way. We regularly watch relatively un-offending series with great passion and dedication. It's our relationship's specialty. And as a result we look … Continue reading Why I needed to both see and not-see that miscarriage on TV.

I am under no obligation to make sense to you

Please don't get me wrong. I love that you are here. I am excited, and I invite you to witness and engage as you feel so drawn to do. But I am drawing the line at what is my responsibility, and what is yours. My intention This blog is about owning and honouring myself. Deeply and … Continue reading I am under no obligation to make sense to you

My baby, and your baby’s funeral. 

My niece (cousin), my gorgeous, innocent, angelic, 9 year old niece, is taking her last​breaths. And it is that once in a life time thing that you wish you never experience. You hope you never understand this. Because this is paradigm shifting. In what world is it fair, or even just ok for a lively, … Continue reading My baby, and your baby’s funeral. 

What would I say to me?

Keep breathing. That's what I would say. One breath at a time.  And then, rather incessantly... It's okay, I'm okay, Baby is okay. It's okay, I'm okay, Baby is okay. It's okay, I'm okay, Baby is okay.  I have a baby. I am pregnant. At least according to the non-existent period, and the 6 different pregnancy tests. … Continue reading What would I say to me?